depression (therapy notes)
my therapist told me it was very worrying for her that after the last session where I told her I had the worst day to date and was suggested to consider a psychiatry facility (which she supported), and then not hearing from me for two months. but, she also trusted that I would make the right decision for myself. I mean. I hope so. I also wish I knew where this trust comes from. From my perspective, I am mostly impulsive, stubborn, and… incompetent. edit: ok that sounded way more negative than I meant for it to be. The good thing here is learning to accept the incomentency; that my limit is just here, even if I had higher expectation. things I thought I should be able to handle are simply out of my reach. I would either have to let it be or ask for help, like I did the other day for the pill refills. and just hope that I will be able to repay that kindness when I am better. it is ok to fail my self expectation and also perhaps that expectation needs to be re-evaluated. I can't be the person operating at the level that I want myself to be running at, so, like, tough shit? I just don't have what it takes. say, fleeting happiness, it made sense to lower my need for it but is it sustainable or healthy? big shock, it's not. so now logistically how do I solve this? anyways, so blessed to have lovely empathetic friends. I love y'all.Like this note? let me know!
>(Thanks!)Sure. ⏎